The pics becoming viral of a ‘Captain Cool’ MS Dhoni merrily playing with his little daughter, while the ‘CSK’ team was busy celebrating their IPL victory, has now earned him the sobriquet ‘Daddy Cool’ and more fans, who are looking at the human side of a battle-scattered veteran of historic wins !
Are young men of today more committed, sincere and demonstrative as caring Dads compared to us, who have grown ups as children and to our own fathers and their fathers of that Victorian era when the well-accepted generation gap existed where one spoke to them only when spoken to ?! What appears is a connect getting established and the small family size is helping.
The young Dads of the 60s were working men ( with fewer working mothers) with large families and live-in parents. Life’s daily struggle often made them exhausted, underpaid and frustrated, worrying about their meager salaries and keeping quiet about their own anxieties so that the rest of the family would have a better life.
Speaking of my Dad, I now realize that despite his love, becoming friends was not usual in those days, but he passed on to us through his exemplary, simple life-style, many of life’s beautiful pursuits like music, literature, films and love for sports and most importantly, being a ‘good human being’ was the lesson he inculcated in all of us.
With time, demographic changes, rapid technology, healthcare, living standards, education system and life-styles have seen huge transformation. But ‘Dads’ who were considered a source of inspiration and fountain of knowledge in the 80’s are now becoming old-style and uncool with their archaic technical skills and old-world values. Parents were the mentors two decades back but not any longer, instead their protective cover is a burden and well-meaning advice now seem like impractical homilies which don’t suit the generation which values its freedom more than its responsibilities.
Whatever the age and position, Dads (and Moms) in general, love unconditionally but often do not allow children to understand them well enough to make sense of their actions. Sometimes they make the mistake of attaching an emotional price tag to everything, meaning that progeny’s success is their success, progeny’s failure is their failure – trying to be the judge of what’s right and wrong because Dad ( and Mom) know what’s best. No longer is that going to work with the youth of today.
Researchers think that adults now pay too much attention to their children at the expense of themselves. Dads (Parents) defer their pleasure trips, close off interests or avenues that they formerly pursued that made them fuller and more interesting people. Being totally focused on the children makes them lose their identities, lowers self-esteem when discarded by them later, struggling to rediscover what’s left as the ‘nest is empty’.
Working on Living 