Among the ‘generic’ words while wishing or sending messages to relatives & friends is the fine adjective ‘Heartfelt’ that’s appended to the greetings, conveying thanks, offering sympathies or apologies (as in belated birthday wishes). In practice, most messages and the on-line greetings are more of a ritual to adhere to the social protocols. Use of catchy forwards borrowed from other sources and ‘cut & paste’ modes, make our task easier.

What’s so special about ‘heartfelt’ wishes and in today’s rapid-fire texts and speech is it discernible ? For one, it has a different feel, emphasizes genuineness showing something coming from the “heart” & not being superficial (& routine). It needn’t be elaborate, but have absence of hypocrisy, feigning or any falsifying embellishment or exaggeration. Beyond the language sincere acts of love & compassion come across as ‘heartfelt’. In our time, the outdated ‘Archie’ cards with words in own writing, added a personal touch !

Some of our talented kith & kin and close friends have a knack for making others feel ‘elated’ on milestone occasions by dedicating a self-made piece of art, painting, poem or writing. Spouses are full of surprises, that don’t always meet with the needed approval but buying one’s favorite item, arranging a snap party, an exotic dinner or sudden travel plan qualifies as a heartfelt gesture. For my milestone ‘70^th’ birthday, my much better-half, tirelessly worked to not only efficiently organize a grand party at a lovely joint but with clandestine guile, contacted my closest friends and persuaded them to attend it !  

An important aspect of ‘heartfelt’ action is thoughtfulness, creativity & being observant to what others like & conjuring a special gift tailored to his/her taste, liking or passion. One of the finest examples came from the legendary ‘Sunny Gavaskar’ in fulfilling the  promise he’d earlier made to cricketer (and avid guitar player) Jemimah Rodrigues. He presented her with a guitar that was amazingly shaped like a cricket bat & he also sang !

Heartfelt are ‘upstanding’ words & support to others in times of distress, facing a crises  or personal loss and that involves offering them unwavering presence, emotional backup and practical help that can make them feel less alone and overwhelmed. The real value of a relationship is often tested not in ‘happy’ times together but in moments of crises !

Finally, it’s spontaneity and sincere intent that matters. Recently a dear friend sent us a beautiful wall hanging for the New Year. Instead of a usual thank you note, I sang and video-taped a Hindi film song with appropriate lyrics & posted it to him. His reply was also in the ‘song’ mode, except that he’s not quite a singer by a long yard and was only appreciating the way we had thanked him ! They were tuneless words sung by him yet it stole our hearts in its glow of warm-hearted reciprocity.    

Our culture of music, art and literature never make us forget or overlook treasures from the past which remain truly ageless. Among many others, one iconic song that has held centre-stage after more than a century is ‘Ekla Chôlo Re’. It is a Bengali patriotic song written by Rabindranath Tagore in 1905 but though the lyrics are in that language it has had great universal appeal. As an inspirational ‘tagline’ it’s widely used by motivational speakers and is often quoted in the context of socio-political change movements and was a favourite of the Mahatma !

The song has a fascinating history and has been the subject of research of Gurudev’s immense body of work. Originally titled as “EKLA”, this most uplifting song was first published in September 1905 issue of  Bhandar magazine & was influenced by a popular Bengali Kirtan song. Like many of his legendary songs, ‘Ekla Cholo’ has had renditions not only from leading exponents of ‘Rabindra Sangeet’ like Suchitra Mitra and Hemanta Mukherji but also by greats like Kishore da, who trained to sing in this genre. Bollywood too was not to be left behind – In 2004, it’s tune was used with Hindi lyrics composed by A.R Rahman and sung by Sonu Nigam in ‘Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose: The Forgotten Hero’. In the celebrated ‘2012’ film ‘Vidya Balan’ starrer ‘Kahaani’, it is sung by Big B, under music direction of  Vishal-Shekhar.

What do the words of the song mean ? A beautiful English translation by Sumona Roy :-

‘If they pay no heed to your call

Walk on your own.Walk alone,

Walk alone, walk alone, walk all alone.

If none speaks, o wretched one,

If all turn their face away & cower in silence

Then open out your heart

Dear one, speak out your mind, voice alone.

If everyone spurns, o wretched one

If all leave you in the lurch in wilderness

Then trample the trail of thorns

With blood stained feet alone, on your own.

If no one holds up a light, o wretched one

And bolts the doors in dark, stormy night 

Then in the lightning fire of pain

Kindle your own heart and

Keep it burning bright alone.’

Watch Film on Netflix

This is a ‘rom-com’ that you’re likely to pick if looking for a break from mindless crime & action genre films and something light and funny. This one fits the bill to some extent but as it happens, sequels rarely live up to promise of first part like ‘De De Pyaar De’ 1 (2019). We confess to bias also, for it was Tabu’s fiesty aura (as the separated wife of Ajay Devgn) that we missed in the Sequel apart from delightful set-ups created in Part 1.

The vexed issue of an attractive young girl insisting on someone much older in age as a life-partner raising hackles in family elders (and relatives in general) was explored & got critical acclaim in R Balki’s ‘Chini Kum’ (2007) with Tabu & Big B ! This film takes off where the Part 1 ended on ‘Thumbs Up’ from the Man’s family comprising of parents, ex-wife and children but not before lots of hits and misses with high drama and laughs. It’s now turn of the Girl’s folks for the shock !

The sequel has however, most significantly the versatile actor Madhavan stepping into a senior role as the heroine’s dishy looking Dad. He makes a  contented pair with Gautami Kapoor, both so-called progressive parents, till ‘fats in in fire’ when they’re confronted with a far older person, their daughter is determined to wed. The plot is all about the shenanigans and maneuvering, Karan Johar type wedding dances and also reference to ‘DDLJ’ and SRK’s valiant efforts to woo his girl’s reluctant Dad. It starts as a frothy mash-up but turns into ‘emotional atyachaar’ in the middle overs, till the makers decide the script be retrieved to an illogical conclusion & so again revert to comedy.

There are mentionable performances – specially Rakul Preet’s spirited show while Ajay Devgn plays the perfect foil to her, as a subdued man trying to manfully face the harsh social realities that he faces. Two other notable actors on show are veteran Javed Jafri as the hero’s Counsellor cum trusted friend and his son, Meezaan, exuding sleek vibes ! Because his role involves some theatrics, the usually impeccable Madhavan, also hams ! We all empathize with his character, the societal pressures make it tough for parents to go along with the curious choices their children make, for it’s a reflection on them too !   

Our suggestion is to friends to seek out the old Hollywood classic “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner’(1967) starring Spenser Tracy, Katherine Hepburn & Sidney Poitier, with a similar theme but made in an entirely different era and with racism as it’s backdrop. A well to do senior white couple have an educated daughter who informs that she’s met someone & wants to bring him over to meet them. When he arrives they are completely taken aback- their child has decided to marry this ‘black’ man & they’re not ready for it at all…It’s a beautiful, thought-provoking film !  

      

It would stating the obvious that we areprone to superstitions irrespective of our family backgrounds, education and value systems with our mothers telling us to ‘wait’ because someone had just sneezed !  Apart from the ill-famed black cat crossing the road being bad luck, we were told cutting fingernails/toenails at night time would bring misfortune, a crow calling could be the precursor to guests arriving, itchy palms signaled the onset of money inflow and our Ma feeding us ‘Dahi’ in the morning of the exams/interviews was helpful augury for success. With passage of time and new technology most have started taking these as old rituals and adhered just to please old folks.

So it’s interesting that superstitions are still alive and thriving in our religion of ‘Cricket’! It’s safe to assume that a billion Indians follow cricket, with varying intensities ! To start from the topper, legendary Big B being a passionate follower of the game, says he never watches a match live since India tends to lose, if he’s watching ! Talking of the India’s master-batter, King Kohli, his alarming dip in form some years back, prompted die-hard fans to attribute it uncharitably to ‘unlucky’ presence of his wife in the stands !

Like folklore that’s associated with the greats, it’s said the ‘God of Cricket’ Sachin would always put on his left pad first, Kapil would look up towards the skies when coming out to bat and 1983 MOM, Mohinder Amarnath had a red handkerchief tucked in. When the scoreboard read ‘111’, English umpire David Shepard would do hop & skip ! There are stories of legendary cricketers and their idiosyncrasies that have been retold by experts on air. Added is ‘commentators curse’ which happens if one starts praising a batter on the field for his stroke-play and soon he gets ‘Out’!   

Closer home, stranger things have happened in families and with friends who’d give an arm to watch an exciting Cricket match. Ladies of the house have joined the razzmatazz of  IPL/WPL  and can distinguish between MI, RR and DC, to name few. I remember fondly my dear Dad and my Pa-in-law, both greatest sports lovers I’ve known for their passion and inevitable despondence if India lost, which was often in the 1980s before it became a Cricketing super-power ! When Sunny, Vishy or any Indian batter approached his century, my Pa-in-law would close his eyes and pray ! 

As a buff, with same chair in front of the TV and the mobile switched off during an tough match going down to the wire, I understand that cricket is full of glorious uncertainties ! But yesterday I too got converted into the mad, mad ways of superstitious : I was waxing eloquent on Virat’s flawless batsmanship as he was heading towards a certain century in the ODI match against Kiwis. A friend responded on Whatsapp ‘ Nazar maat lagao abhi’. To my horror, Virat played uppishly & got out on 93 ! His ‘Folly’ or ‘Jolly’ Bad Luck ?!   

In last few years, there’s seems to be discernible change in how even old friends interact when they reconnect. Emotionally buoyed by the alma mater’s fraternal bonds, in earlier times they’d meet with banter, colourful language, bawdy old jokes shared over drinks & even ‘roast’ someone without offending them. Animated conversations leading to any serious arguments based on ideological or political differences of individuals were rare.

Of late the informal group chats or the casual meets of old friends & relatives, often have someone inevitably trying to mediate when ‘charcha’ on sensitive and burning issues of national & international importance, lead to heated discussions. Increasingly, political one-upmanship is on the rise, ideological beliefs are more deeply intertwined with one’s core identity, patriotic feelings, moral values & left or right leanings that are acquired. A disagreement on what one feels, is a personal attack rather than a difference of opinion.

In one such event, old friends found themselves taking positions as even routine topics assumed political flavor. A casual remark on the nice winter climate in Mumbai by one was met with a rejoinder ‘Visit Delhi to enjoy our weather’ from disgruntled friends, in a grim reminder to Capital’s ‘AQI’ levels. A travel enthusiast was sharing details of his trek in the hills but soon it veered to the threat being posed to ‘Aravalli’ mountains through illegal mining ! Few expressed interest in recipes & art of locating good eateries & were halted by anxious friends. ‘How’s the water in your area ?’ taking from Indore tragedies.

On the divisive discourses are also spate of films with a socio-political slant. A friend not known overtly for his political views, was excited watching ‘Dhurandhar’ and expounded on the blockbuster’s merits. Others nodded animatedly but two guys shook their heads ‘A good action film, blurred facts with fiction to set propaganda’ ! A fiery debate ensued ! We always talk of Cricket & there’s concern for the Indian team’s future without Rohit & Virat & hope that in the coming T20 World Cup, they would be there for us. But with the recent IPL imbroglio, views differ : why mix politics with sports & blame poor SRK for getting a Bangladeshi player for KKR ? On the rebound, BD is refusing to play in India …  

Many of us are taking stands against one another & straining established relationships. Loyalties are formed and fed on high emotions not through a dispassionate examination of facts or objective analysis & it’s easier to become defensive when those firm beliefs are questioned. SM, hyped media, written post can be easily misinterpreted and algorithms often promote emotional, divisive content, creating echo chambers and making people likely to see “other side” in a negative light. And old friendships can fall by the wayside !

Of the life goals that elude us most of  the time like a proverbial mirage, is the constant endeavor to make others feel ‘Happy’. Yet, right from the growing up years, someone or the other wasn’t  pleased with whatever we did or tried to accomplish !

Mom would often admonish us with veiled threats ‘Your Dad wouldn’t like it’ while in other cases Dad would give a friendly caution ‘You know how your Mom feels ?’Annoyed with innocent pranks, dipping into other’s possessions or taking bigger share, a sibling fracas would break out! From academic disciplines pursued to preferred careers to one’s choice of a life-partner & family size and upbringing of the kids are all debatable issues where not all the family members across the board, end up on the ‘happy’ side ! 

The first major area wherein one’s attempts to share happiness are severely tested are in professional life. Since the job comes first before settling down into domesticity, it’s the maxim ‘Boss is always right’ that every sincere worker learns ! But what if the goal post changes with every new Boss who comes in with a different set of likes & dislikes.

During my service I’d seen many bosses : one disliked employees wearing half shirts while another loved to hold us back for staff meetings late in the evening. There was I recall a Top Boss with medical issues and an officer carrying his medicine bag alongside. Whenever things went contrary to his moods, he’d make a sour face “I’m not happy’! Everyone would pray to that !  Dear God, please do something that makes him normal.

Keeping the ‘soul-mate’ always happy is a utopian dream of marital bliss, vows are made for eternal togetherness and sincerest efforts are made at the start but the classic ‘seven year itch’ kicks in thereafter. With parenthood come new challenges : school admissions, early morning school bus, PTA meets, home-tasks & games. Suddenly, before you realize kids are grown up, not listening to you with their head-phones on ! Catching them for a chat or quality time over dinner becomes a rarity. Life goes on with a generational shift and along the way come many angry disagreements over values, testing the family ties !    

With wealth, affluence and supreme authority comes the entitlement to ‘happiness’ that the powerful feel the society at large owes to them & their subservience will allow them a better life than the others. For hegemony and to gain control over other people’s lives & properties, a pompous world leader has become famous for his lines ‘Make me happy’ !   

It is our trusted friends who cushion us from disillusionment and show us how to define our life-mode and not by living just for others. It’s a fundamental human drive linked to our well-being and which benefits us with better health and stronger relationships. True happiness often lies in contentment & living in the present rather than chasing dreams !

(The Silence of the Lady?)

With the plethora of serials of the crime & mystery thriller genre on OTT platforms each promising to be more spellbinding, what made us opt for ‘Mrs Deshpande’ ? Two major reasons were – our all time favorite star ‘Madhuri Dixit’ hitting the small screen in most intriguing promos &  that the director was Nagesh Kukunoor, an acclaimed film-maker.

As stated in the credits, the inspiration of the Web-series comes from French series ‘La Mante’ but to old film buffs like us, the plot might appear loosely based on the chilling American horror-thriller “The Silence of the Lambs’ (1991) that got five Oscars including Best Actor & Best Actress to Sir Anthony Hopkins & Jodie Foster for amazing portrayals. There are many similarities to the American classic (even the ending) like seeking the agency of a convicted serial killer lodged in jail to unravel the complex serial murders that have recurred again after two decades with striking resemblances to the past serial crimes. The convict with his psychology of a criminal, was best suited to understand how the mind of the new killer operated, using his methods !

This is a crime thriller with a storyline that spans over long period of time & events. No spoilers here – it’s revealed right from the beginning that ‘Zeenat’ (originally called Mrs. Deshpande) is a convicted serial killer who’s serving a sentence and enjoys a good image for her impeccable conduct in prison and who loves her cooking. Into her life comes the Police Commissioner who had nailed her but now seeks her help since he knows that she’s no ordinary criminal. Madhuri Dixit adroitly executes a complex lead role, emoting through inscrutable facial that are tough to penetrate. She exhibits composure of a person in control (but has a few genial moments too), unlike the chilling menace of Dr. Hannibal Lecter of ‘The Silence of the Lambs’ ! With her impassiveness, it’s an uncertain route to take for the cops to discern her real thoughts and secrets. Kudos to her for the role she plays with finesse, despite the fact her character could’ve had meatier content ! 

For a maker of Kukunoor’s stature, the series should have had tighter script & concluded in five episodes instead of six that drag a bit after the third. There are many sub-plots, red herrings & false leads prolonging the final climax and sinister characters introduced are not properly fleshed out. Of supporting actors, Priyanshu Chatterjee is impressive as Police Commissioner. Siddharth Chandekar, the deeply committed Cop, who undergoes emotional turmoil as the entire case unravels, tries to bring intensity in his performance while the other actors are adequate !  

Madhuri fans hope having entered OTT’s  thriller genre that often provides challenging women-centric roles, she soon gets to play gritty characters ala Kate Winslet in ‘Mare of Easttown’ or closer home  Shefali Shah in ‘Delhi Crime -1’.  Move on ‘Mrs. Deshpande’ !

Old habits die hard and old timers (like us) find it difficult to accept change specially if small utility items become relics of the past due to new technology, aesthetic sense and space constraints. It was a surprise in the New Year when our neighborhood stationery wala (who also displays a variety of nick-nacks like little statues, souvenirs & curios that sell ) has stopped keeping ‘table calendars’ I bought last year, being very low on demand. What’s the use he countered : people manage time & dates through their smart phones !  

Undaunted, I tried the crowded galis of ‘Mathuradas Road’ nearby (a big market place for fruits, vegetables, confectionaries in our Kandivili West suburb of Mumbai (a place with no connection to holy city in UP). After some excursion, I found one ‘Gift’ shop that met my needs. The first (‘January’) page of the smart calendar I chose, had appropriate catchy words: ‘There’s a rainbow at the end of every rain’ & such nice ones on each page.

Mundane and old-world relics, as they may sound to most tech-savvy folks, I always felt the humble table calendars, helped in being visually organized, practicing efficienttime management and reducing time in referencing diaries & notes. They served as constant reminders for deadlines, meetings and tasks, while also acting as a decorative & tangible tool for planning at our homes and even in the offices. My vivid impression of my Dad’s work style was his orderly desk at home, replete with pen stand, ink blotter & calendar !  

Calendars, however, aren’t the best substitutes for the habitual ‘diary-writers’ who make elaborate daily notes to keep track of their busy schedules. To senior citizens used to their old practices, the morning must start with a prayer and a review of what’s to follow in course of the day : replying to the NY/ birthday/Anniversary messages, bill payments, refilling medicine chest of self & spouse, calling the carpenter/plumber/driver, visiting the bank to inquiry about latest deposit rates and of course doing the grocery shopping.

Sitting on our writing table or desk, the calendar readily provides us distraction-free way to manage our schedules, improve focus and give satisfaction of having done a fair day’s ‘work from home’ making it valuable for personal productivity & mental agility. It’s not just this month but entire year ‘2026’ that’s in front of us – make the Best of it, Friends. As my calendar’s ‘Feb’ page says ‘Don’t Wish For Less Problems, Wish For More Skills !

Often it is said that cinema, leave aside the artistic nuances, cinematic brilliance, soul-stirring music, captivating story-telling, social & nationalistic messaging, if so intended,  has the sole purpose of entertaining the audiences, which invests in time, travel and resources, to get their money’s worth ! Quite true in the overall context, till OTT came along to make a big difference: the lack of big theatre ‘dolby’ feel is made up by excellent scripts, stories, actors with the flexibility of enjoying home-comfort and cheaper snacks !

As regular cinegoers in the past, we have shifted almost entirely to OTT platforms, sure that even those big screen blockbusters will one day descend down to our home theatre. Many of our Top Ten picks for 2025 have been watched on Neflix/Prime/Sony Liv/Zee etc that include some which were made exclusively as Web-Series & not for the theatres.  The list below is not in ranking order but in chronological sequence as we saw them :

	Name of the Film	Lead Actor/Star	Themes Dealt	Platform
1.	I Want to Talk	Abhishek Bachan	A Man’s Fortitude	OTT
2.	Sitaare Zameen Par	Amir Khan	Differently Abled	Theatre
3.	Kaalidhar Laapata	Abhishek Bachan	Family Drama	OTT
4.	Tanvi the Great	Anupam Kher	Autistic Courage	Theatre
5.	Court Kacheri	Pawan Malhotra	Judicial Corruption	OTT
6.	Jolly LLB 3	Akshay/ Arshad	Courtroom Drama	Theatre
7.	Thode Door Thode Paas	Pankaj Kapoor	Digital Detoxing	OTT
8.	Humans in the Loop	Sonal Madhushkr	AI Workers of MP	OTT
9.	Homebound	Ishaan/ Vishal	Migrant/Employmt	OTT
10.	Saali Mohabbat	Radhika Apte	Thriller/Mystery	OTT

We must add a caveat that we couldn’t possibly see all the films made in 2025 & some we avoided on grounds of excessive gore & violence. We didn’t see the mega-historical ‘Chaava’ which received great reviews as also ‘Dhurandhar’ which is still making waves. However, we did watch the runaway superhit ‘Saiyaara’ but weren’t greatly enthused !

As I watched Kumarmangalam Birla, the suave yet mild-mannered business magnate’s debut in Big B’s famed KBC, I felt this was one of finest I’ve witnessed that raised the bar for the hugely popular game-show by many notches. Not just for exciting quiz quotient alone, but for the wisdom, gentility and elegance that it brought to the entire show !

The unassuming KB (Kumar Birla) had earlier modestly claimed to Big B that he was nervous coming to KBC, but he not only answered nearly all the quiz questions posed with alacrity & no fuss (except two audience polls taken) it was his gentle demeanor, watched by his adoring family from the sidelines, that fascinated us as an audience and also how Big B, the superb Quizmaster, brought into focus the facets of the grand old legacy of one greatest industrial families of our country, the ‘Birlas’.

KB shared that when he lost his visionary Father, Aditya Birla, he was only 28 but relied on his strengths of solid educational background (MBA, CA), some work experience in his family business and the strong ethics, value systems ingrained in the family through generations starting from the legendary GD Birla, who’s hallmark was his simplicity. Big B through his personal experiences related many anecdotes of the Birla family including reading out in famous baritone, a treasured letter written by GD Birla to his brother !

KB’s countenance showed that despite being a scion of great eminence in the country, he wore the mantle of industrial power and wealth with gentleness & that he was basically a good ‘Family Man’. This was evidenced from the glowing tributes his two very loving daughters and son gave him as did his wonderful wife Neerja, who also brought out the banter with the human side of a forgetful husband albeit with a huge business empire.  

Truly, it was a jugalbandi of sorts with two iconic figures KB and Big B sitting opposite each other, exchanging high praises and sharing funny stories including those relating to another iconic business tycoon & legend, the late Ratan Tata. In fact Big B looked visibly embarrassed when KB called him the ‘GOAT’ not only for the country but the entire world. When the hooter went off to close the show after 90 minutes, Big B looked disappointed that the show was ending. So were we, for such shows are so rare today !