According to the redoubtable writer Javed Akhtar, in every meaningful relationship – be it filial, familial between siblings and close relatives and between friends we acquire and cultivate in our lives, there is a running thread of ‘friendship’ that keeps it strong. It assumes forms of love, affection, camaraderie, regard, respect& a kaleidoscope of emotions &sentiments. Mothers have a weakness for their ‘ladla’ and for Dad’s the girl is the apple of the eye yet as they grow up, Dads and Sons often start sharing a kindred spirit while Moms and Daughters start confiding more in each other that’s akin to friendship. Grandparents have most fun with their children’s progeny as their partners in crime in their second innings in reliving childhood.
Interestingly siblings go though many time zones before they become real friends in later years. In those early stages, with big age difference, the elder ones can be bullies to exercise control over younger siblings, demanding obedience in carrying out sundry errands. In the 60-70s, we grew up learning to respect our elder siblings and address them as Dadas/Didis (in Bengali) & similar sounding terms in other lingos. In many cases, kind elders did protect the younger ones from wrath of strict parents. A lot has changed since. With Gen Zee, age and seniority aren’t as important as is free speech !
There’s a common belief that marriages are on firmer ground where both partners feel ‘equal’, they laugh with and even at each other and takesome ribbing without feeling hurt as old buddies do with close friends. Being marriedwe’re supposed to have each other’s backs but when we think like comrades, we don’t make a noise about it or expect any return favours. Amity in marriage can beaffected by ‘excess of familiarity’ yet over time transition from love to friendship and passion to compassion can happen with the right attitudes, humour &kinship and by enjoying shared interests !
Finally, we makeand break ‘friendships’ we choose to be part of, that often make the difference between happier, fulfilling lives and ones that are desolate in loneliness of solitude. Great Muhammed Ali had said ‘It’s not something you learn in school but if you haven’t learnt the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything’ ! That’s why we cherish having old buddiesaround orsay ‘He’s like a brother to me’. If there’s a good thing in the world that’s not overrated, it’s having true friends for life !
Wish a bright, happy& colourful Diwali to every ‘Friend’, far & near, online &offline !
Working on Living 