Of the life goals that elude us most of the time like a proverbial mirage, is the constant endeavor to make others feel ‘Happy’. Yet, right from the growing up years, someone or the other wasn’t pleased with whatever we did or tried to accomplish !
Mom would often admonish us with veiled threats ‘Your Dad wouldn’t like it’ while in other cases Dad would give a friendly caution ‘You know how your Mom feels ?’Annoyed with innocent pranks, dipping into other’s possessions or taking bigger share, a sibling fracas would break out! From academic disciplines pursued to preferred careers to one’s choice of a life-partner & family size and upbringing of the kids are all debatable issues where not all the family members across the board, end up on the ‘happy’ side !
The first major area wherein one’s attempts to share happiness are severely tested are in professional life. Since the job comes first before settling down into domesticity, it’s the maxim ‘Boss is always right’ that every sincere worker learns ! But what if the goal post changes with every new Boss who comes in with a different set of likes & dislikes.
During my service I’d seen many bosses : one disliked employees wearing half shirts while another loved to hold us back for staff meetings late in the evening. There was I recall a Top Boss with medical issues and an officer carrying his medicine bag alongside. Whenever things went contrary to his moods, he’d make a sour face “I’m not happy’! Everyone would pray to that ! Dear God, please do something that makes him normal.
Keeping the ‘soul-mate’ always happy is a utopian dream of marital bliss, vows are made for eternal togetherness and sincerest efforts are made at the start but the classic ‘seven year itch’ kicks in thereafter. With parenthood come new challenges : school admissions, early morning school bus, PTA meets, home-tasks & games. Suddenly, before you realize kids are grown up, not listening to you with their head-phones on ! Catching them for a chat or quality time over dinner becomes a rarity. Life goes on with a generational shift and along the way come many angry disagreements over values, testing the family ties !
With wealth, affluence and supreme authority comes the entitlement to ‘happiness’ that the powerful feel the society at large owes to them & their subservience will allow them a better life than the others. For hegemony and to gain control over other people’s lives & properties, a pompous world leader has become famous for his lines ‘Make me happy’ !
It is our trusted friends who cushion us from disillusionment and show us how to define our life-mode and not by living just for others. It’s a fundamental human drive linked to our well-being and which benefits us with better health and stronger relationships. True happiness often lies in contentment & living in the present rather than chasing dreams !
Working on Living 