A phrase often used for good-looking young pairs in our early, pre-marriage years, was the imagery that came when ITC launched the campaign, ‘Made for Each Other’, in 1965 for Wills (Navy Cut) replete with the picture of a young couple sharing a laugh in different settings – reading a Polish joke book in living room, on the beach, in the rain ! This picture of marital bliss with its starry romance wasn’t so apparent to us, as two strangers in an arranged marriage wherein families were really ‘Made for Each Other’ !
Having put in four & half decades now, my much better half, Tandra & I, agree that old phrase wasn’t made for us. There’s been lot of ‘make-up’ and ‘make-do’ with each other over the years & it’s work in progress, as is with our much married dear friends. What stands out for most is ‘complementing’ rather than ‘complimenting’ the other half. We now hardly sing eulogies, but at times we offer apologies ! We’ve discovered that despite our individualities, our ‘complementary relationship’ with different characteristics can together make a “Whole.” Often our strengths & our weaknesses balance each other out.
In our case things panned out as if all planned ! As a senior citizen my hearing is getting impaired but she can still hear a pin drop ! My deftness with numbers (old banker habits never fade) is intact and I know by heart all my cell numbers, pins & passwords but she, sadly can’t remember her mobile phone number ! However, names of friends & family, birthday dates & anniversaries are hard-fed in her brain while I’m mostly at sea in that. But the biggest gap stays in our culinary skills, wife’s hands are gifted to transform the simplest into gourmet meals while my best effort is breakfast of toast & scrambled eggs !
Like normal old couples, we disagree on everything (ranging from shopping & spending to our health issues & politics) but we share many common interests that even surprise us. From films, theatre, books, music, singing to traveling & great cuisine have all been passions of our simple lives in which ‘Cricket’ and ‘Old Friends have had a special place ! Thrilling India matches are seen from separate rooms as I can get boisterous if India’s in trouble, while she’s all tensed up ! Being sporty types since childhood, in my heydays I was a fairly decent Badminton & Cricket player while Tandra, a Champion Swimmer !
Friends, for lasting relationships, complementing each other while possessing different, often opposite, strengths or qualities are so vital. When combined, they create a better, more complete, effective whole. It signifies a synergistic relationship where one element enhances, improves or completes the other. Yet as always, the Mrs. is the Wiser-Half !
Working on Living 