*Those who are married & have played cricket will know

That like runs scored in cricket, the marriage does grow,

*In cricket two batters at crease together face opposition

In marriage two have to unite to conform to institutions,

*In cricket players are chosen by a team of wise selectors

In marriage partnership is forged byold family members,

*In game of cricket a full team would need to have eleven

In marriage, parents decide for you, leaving it on ‘Heaven’,

*In cricket two umpires discuss when there’s disagreement

In marriage everyone talks before reaching any agreement,

*In cricket the batters face bowling that can be fast or slow

In marriage partners adjust and somehow put a good show,

*In cricket opposing side often use the googly or wrong one

In marriage misunderstanding arises, compromise is done,

*Cricket has its ups & downs & many glorious uncertainties

In marriage’s chances need be taken for positive certainties,

*Cricket’s been called ‘gentleman’s game’ of leisure & honor

Marriage isn’t a game, it needs commitment & perseverance

And in this Partnership, Women Always Emerge Stronger !

By Somnath Sinha

We ‘Sinha’ siblings have also always shared fond reminiscences of our dear Dadu-Didas, Aunts, Uncles and Cousins as part of our growing up years. Under the broad umbrella covering ‘Uncles’, we didn’t have a real ‘Chacha-ji’ (though all Dad’s friends were Chachas/Uncles to us)but on the maternal side, we did have two real and really endearing Mama-jis, who remain unforgettable for the kind of men they were !

Interestingly, our two Mamashadfairly distinct personalities. Elder (Boro) Mamaji was soft-spoken, kind, generousand gentle and no one (incl his kids) ever heard him speak loudly because he could quietly make his point. Chote Mama was years younger to him (Mom was their eldest sister). He was vocal, suave, flamboyant, fair, handsome & could regale us with Hemant Kumar songs like ‘..Sun jadil ki daastaan..’ and jokes about how simple villagers were taught the military drills that he had witnessed !

My Dad was very close to both his ‘Shalas’ and in the early part of our childhood years till the late 1960s, we’d have annual visits to our ‘Mamarbari’ in Village Harinavi near Calcutta (now a part of main Kolkata). Dadu, the revered family patriarch would teach us stories of patriotism and songs like “DhonoDhannePushpeBhora..”. In a sprawling house with nearby maidans and ponds, life then was so simple and idyllic and made memorable by the affection we got from Mama’s, Maima’s and Mashis. We still recall  thatevery family gathering/weddings there were bright and joyful, every childhood memory remains still sweet and every life lesson was easy to digest and never to forget.

Coming back to our Chote Mama’s quintessential charm was the memory of beautiful songs that he and Choto Maima would sing (being a trained singer) and that made us fall in love with Bengali Music and Rabindra Sangeet. Mama’s being ‘Khati Bangalis’ were great soccer and cricket fans. I remember as a young boy, when India beat Aussies in 1959 in famous Kanpur Test, Dad and Chote Mama returned home crying with joy. When our Mamarbari folks visited us in our home in Lucknow, it was a major event & the family photographer was called to capture the ‘Sinha-Mitra’ families for posterity.

All this comes back as we stumble upon old family albums and B&W pics and marvel at how innocent we looked. One pic I’ve restored is from when Chote Mama’s marriage in the late 1950s – the baraat went to Bhagalpur and I was made the ‘Neet Bor’ and felt very important. I’m told a young girl was my counterpart. Both Mama & I look so cool.

As John Green put it beautifully ‘One day, you’re 17 and you’re planning for someday. And then quietly, without you really noticing, someday is today. And then someday is yesterday. And this is your life.”. Even at 70, there’s future for us hopefully, but there’s so much to look back upon. I just lean back & travel in time with all those moments !

For filmdom’s illustrious ‘Ganguly’ parivaar, 13^th October day has had mixed historical significance – it happened to be eldest brother and thespian actor, Dadamoni’s (Ashok Kumar) birthday but most ironically became the tragic day when youngest brother and singer extraordinaire, Kishore Kumar passed away in 1985 at the age of 58, leaving a grieving family and a legion of fans, followers and music lovers who still adore him.

Four decades have now gone by since the legendary Kishoreda left on his longest ‘safar’ (journey), yet he still trends on top of the charts as crazecontinues across generations including GenZee for his incredibly mellifluous voice, rhythm, melody, comic timing that yodels its way intoa billions hearts withgay abandon, but also turns philosophical& heartrending with pathos, reflecting vicissitudes of life or the pangs of separation ! 

So much has already been shared, spoken and written about his tumultuous personal life with a fair share of anecdotes on his idiosyncrasies and insights into the life of a musical genius who never believed in pretensions and despite the eccentric image, enjoyedsolitude, mysticism of nature and shunned fickleness of human relationships. For die-hard Kishore fans, it comes as no surprise that in his interpretation of ‘zindagi’ (life) his versatile singing expressed all the different hues & shades. Let’s look at how some of his superb renditions of the ‘Zindagi’ theme in his songs play out :

*Life means never to stop, to keep moving on

‘Ik raasta hai Zindagi, joh tham gaye toh kuch nahi..’ from ‘Kala Pathar’

*Life teaches us triumph comes after defeat

  ‘Zindagi ki yahi reet hai, haar ke baad jeet hai..’ from  ‘Mr. India’

*Life is not knowing what comes tomorrow

‘Zindagi ek safar hai suhana, yahan kal kya ho kisne jana..’ from ‘Andaz’.

*Life gives no second chances, what’s done is gone

‘Zindagi ke safar mein guzar jate hai jo mukaam ..’ from ‘Aap Ki Kasam’

*Life’s journey is a mystery, no one can fathom it

‘Zindagi ka safar hai yeh kaisa safar koi samjha nahi koi jana nahi’ from ‘Safar’.

*Life is a song oflove that every heart must sing

‘Zindagi pyar ka geet hai, ise har dil ko gana padega..’ from Souten

Another feature in his amazing range of Hindi film songs of different genres was his love for symbolism in the idea of life being a journey, that we were travelers who are never sure of our destinations but the varied experiences we gather often take us to our paths & goals. In one of his finest songs that he himself composed & rendered was from the philosophic ‘Door Ka Rahi’ as he sang ‘Panthi hoon main us path ka, aanth nahi jiska, aas mere hai jiski disha, aadhar mere maan ka..’.So sublime and beautiful ! 

Parents (and elder family members in erstwhile joint families) put in lot of efforts to find suitable, apt names for their newly born in conformity with religious, cultural and auspicious traditions. Ceremonial ‘naam-karan’ functions are held with much fanfare in households to give official sanctity to chosen name. As son of Bengali parents, I’m told there’s family history attached to the name (derived from Lord Shiva) given to me.

The trends moved with times from the traditional ‘Devi-Devtas’, ‘Literary Figures’ and Freedom Fighters’to other options -those inspired by role models from various fields speciallyiconic ones. As the famous story goes, ‘God of Cricket’ got his name ‘Sachin’ since his Dad was a huge fan of the legendary composer ‘Sachin Dev Burman’.The, young Kiwi cricket icon ‘Rachin Ravindra’ of Indian origin got his name as a combo of two batting greats Sachin and Rahul Dravid. In many KBC episodes besotted with their idol Big B in front, some contestants claim they got their identity from his name or his son, Abhishek’s. There are similar stories abounding in the social media of other stars.

We’ve thus far spoken of strong male names our boys are bestowed with and that’s so chauvinistic. In reality the names given to our girls have a much more ethereal, lyrical, musical note to them, borrowed as they also are from domains of art, drama, literature, music, dance. Yet the modern parent looks for the more exotic& ethnic. As a Senior citizen with grown up progeny, advent of grand-daughters is much welcome and since yesterday I suddenly discovered a dozen names that our children could put into use !

There’s a lot of preference for the names with letter ‘S’ (it’s seems auspicious) – we have ‘Smriti’, ‘Shefali’, ‘Sneh’& ‘Sree Charani’ ! Looking for the name that begins early in alphabets, we have ‘Amanjot ‘ & ‘Deepti’ and the reliable sounding ‘Harman’ to begin with !  If you preferpetite short names, we have ‘Richa’, ‘Radha’ & ‘Pratika’ but if you’re looking for something jewel-like, we have ‘Jem’ (short for Jemimah !). How did we so quickly get so many wonderful names for girls. These are the ‘World Champions’ of Women’s Cricket, who at stroke of 2^ndNov midnight created history in and for India !

Finally as we now say ‘Behind Every Great Woman is a Manstanding there to Support’ Let’s not forget a redoubtable, soft spoken Coach who’s name begins with ‘A’ – Amol ! 

As sports anchors love to exclaim ‘It’s ‘Super Sunday’ today for by mid-afternoon the intrepid, path-breaking ‘Indian Women in Blue’ will step out one Final time to have a dash at lifting the Women’s World Cup that has so far eluded them, on occasions with heartbreaking closeness. After that historic SF win, it’s going to be ‘edge of seat’ stuff !

And fortuitously today also happens to the 60^th Birthday of the phenomenalstar/actor who played the fictional Coach in the brilliant sports film ‘Chak De’ (2007) who instils belief & fortitude in a team of women hockey players who go on to lift the World Cup. Sharukh Khan also known as ‘King Khan’ and ‘Badshah of Bollywood’ for his exalted superstar status in Hindi filmdom turns ‘60’ (finally !) without denting his image as the ‘eternal symbol of romance’. There are glowing tributes flowing in for the man who created a ‘Larger than Life’ persona in a tough industry, despite being an outsider !

To be honest, many senior citizens like me, have been film buffs since our school days and have been weaned on veteran acting stalwarts like Balraj Sahni, Dadamoni (Ashok Kumar), Dilip Kumar etc, the Rajesh Khanna craze of the 70’s and the emergence of the ‘Angry Young Man’ cult that Big B ushered in thereafter. Not to be great followers of SRK’s of ‘stutter and speak’, ‘throw arms wide open’ and ‘crinkle eyes’ in plethora of films of ‘romance’ of ‘Mills & Boon’ variety, shouldn’t be taken as us acting superior !

But I had been completely bowled by his high-powered, no holds barred, performance in ‘Chak De’ as ‘Kabir’ the beleaguered Hockey Coach (based on an Indian Coach) who takes it upon himself to form a champion team of ‘diverse, disunited women’ from all parts and prepare them for competing in the World Cup against the best in business. As the girls rally around him with spirit of ‘will to win’ inthe Finals he gives a stirring speech ‘Woh Sattar Minute !’ where he exhorts them to give the best they’ve ever given.

Today as rejuvenated Indian Women take on the resilient South Africans in the Finals that promises to be a humdinger, we should have SRK, the Evergreen Birthday Boy, giving an inspiring message to the girls. Except it’ll have to be ‘WOH 700 MINUTES’ !

“Sisters and brothers are like streetlights along the road, they don’t make the distance any shorter but they light up the path and make the walk worthwhile “. It’s special messaging time to myDidis/Sister, unbeatable ‘Barodian’ Bijoya, erudite Sumita, evergreen Shibani and the last, never the least, the ever dependableKalyani!Let me happily also add my dear cousin Didis& sisters in India and Overseas :Khukudi, Didimoni, Piyadidiand late Rumadifrom my Dad’s side and dearBibia, Bubul, Chumki, Chotkanand Pushya from our ‘Mamar-bari’ side,in extendingaffectionate greetingson this occasion.

What a remarkable roller coaster journeyit’s been for all of us with many stories to tell the grandchildren in our autumn years. Of our reminiscences from growing up years, the funny side of ourantics and aberrations andability to remain in touch even now, despite distances & time zones. From the childhooddays are fond memories of Big Boss Didis, demolishers of the school bullies and problem solvers of homework, protectors from the wrath of parents (Mom), providers of pocket money and the occasional ice-cream !

Sisters havebeensaviours, guardians, mentors acting as our moral lodestars. Theygrew wings and came into their own, carving out niches for themselves as women of substance and bringing glory to their families and friends!The quintessential (Choto)Bhaiwith a very toothy grin and now a greying senior citizen, I remember the good old Lucknow days of sibling bonding, fights &of carefree frolicwith our sisters and cousins in the extended ‘Sinha family’ under watchful eyes of our eldersand also the delightfully idyllic holidays in Harinavi, Kolkata in our ‘Mamarbari’. Later came the exotically grand reunion meets and ‘destination’ weddings/celebrationsthat happened inour extended families.

An old ‘Karen Carpenter’ song of nostalgia goes as ‘When I was young, I listened to the radio. waiting for my favorite song..’ The old songs I still follow but memories are stored more in the heart, than in the old family albums. God bless you all and your wonderful families !

Love & Pronams (where applicable) from Sanju 

According to the redoubtable writer Javed Akhtar, in every meaningful relationship  – be it filial, familial between siblings and close relatives and between friends we acquire and cultivate in our lives, there is a running thread of  ‘friendship’ that keeps it strong. It assumes forms of love, affection, camaraderie, regard, respect& a kaleidoscope of emotions &sentiments. Mothers have a weakness for their ‘ladla’ and for Dad’s the girl is the apple of the eye yet as they grow up, Dads and Sons often start sharing a kindred spirit while Moms and Daughters start confiding more in each other that’s akin to friendship. Grandparents have most fun with their children’s progeny as their partners in crime in their second innings in reliving childhood.

Interestingly siblings go though many time zones before they become real friends in later years. In those early stages, with big age difference, the elder ones can be bullies to exercise control over younger siblings, demanding obedience in carrying out sundry errands. In the 60-70s, we grew up learning to respect our elder siblings and address them as Dadas/Didis (in Bengali) & similar sounding terms in other lingos. In many cases, kind elders did protect the younger ones from wrath of strict parents. A lot has changed since. With Gen Zee, age and seniority aren’t as important as is free speech !

There’s a common belief that marriages are on firmer ground where both partners feel ‘equal’, they laugh with and even at each other and takesome ribbing without feeling hurt as old buddies do with close friends. Being marriedwe’re supposed to have each other’s backs but when we think like comrades, we don’t make a noise about it or expect any return favours. Amity in marriage can beaffected by ‘excess of familiarity’ yet over time transition from love to friendship and passion to compassion can happen with the right attitudes, humour &kinship and by enjoying shared interests !

Finally, we makeand break ‘friendships’ we choose to be part of, that often make the difference between happier, fulfilling lives and ones that are desolate in loneliness of solitude. Great Muhammed Ali had said ‘It’s not something you learn in school but if you haven’t learnt the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything’ ! That’s why we cherish having old buddiesaround orsay ‘He’s like a brother to me’. If there’s a good thing in the world that’s not overrated, it’s having true friends for life !

Wish a bright, happy& colourful Diwali to every ‘Friend’, far & near, online &offline !

Our generation from the 1960-70s might remember a fine Hollywood comedy ‘Where Were You When the Lights Went Out’ starring Doris Day centering on the real-life, massive black-out which befell New York on 9th Nov.’1965. While the film brought situational humour and craziness of various kinds, it’s not a laughing matter for those caught in a middle of crises beyond their control, till life gets back to its daily normal !

Such a situation happened in our megacity Mumbai yesterday afternoon albeit of lesser intensity than in ‘Where Were You..’ but enough to throw the city out of gear and poor commuters returning from work completely in the lurch. Suddenly, most of the three lac ‘Autos’ and ‘Taxis’ across Mumbai had spluttered to a grinding halt and not able to operate. Popular daily tabloid ‘Midday’ titled today’s front page ‘City Hit By Gas Trouble’ ! It reported ‘Mumbai reels under a severe energy crises after the gas supply collapsed on Sunday, forcing CNG pumps to shut down from Monday morning..the issue is likely to be resolved only by Tuesday noon. Commuters are bracing for another chaotic day’ !

Where were we when all this was building up ? Actually, stranded on the road at about 7 pm and desperately trying to flag down an auto or taxi. Hordes of people, mostly office returning men and women were also competing to find a willing savior but to no avail. Like good &  model citizens we use the reliable ‘Metro’ often but in Mumbai, ‘Autos’ are the real lifeline for providing the last mile connectivity. After some tries, like resilient ‘Mumbaikars’ we decided to walk towards our home 2 kms away. Unfortunately, our footwear that evening (leather shoes & high heeled chappals) weren’t quite ready for it…

Big B has said in one of his KBC shows ‘Koshish karne walon ki kabhi haar nahi hoti’ ! True enough, like a gift from heaven, suddenly an Auto stopped almost next to us, to let off a lady who’d reached her destination. To us it was like winning a mini lottery ! Yes Mumbai is always on the move but when it stops, it just doesn’t seem to move !   

Actress Katharine Hepburn (1907-2003) and Actor Spencer Tracy (1900-1967) were a legendary Hollywood  couple, both on and off-screen. There’s a famous anecdote about them that when they first met, Hepburn said, “I fear I may be too tall for you, Mr. Tracy” and the short statured Tracy replied, “Don’t worry, I’ll cut you down to my size.” Some say to that ‘Don’t mess with small sized men for they can be proud of their big hearts’ !

Beyond the fable of little David who slew the demon Goliath are real life stories of men born of short height or small physicality but who achieved giant stature in their domains that range from Emperor Napoleon to Comedian Charlie Chaplin to Soccer Icon Diego Maradona and Aussie Cricket legend Sir Don Bradman just to name a few. It’s the stuff that inspiring battles are made when one being smaller is labeled an underdog for his size when pitted against adversaries. It’s also figurative in a fight against the powerful.

Not many  really knew much about the cricketer called ‘Temba Bavuma’, the short, low-profile and intrepid Proteas Captain till he led from the front playing a stellar role along-with ace batter Aden Markram to help SA win the 2025 Test World Cup against the mighty Aussies. Despite those who have questioned his lower batting average and being chosen as the Leader of SA team, their Selectors have reposed faith in him.

In the on-going First Test of the Series played against SA in Eden Gardens, the final day of reckoning came for the powerful Indian batting line-up needing just 124 runs to win. But by some inept display against quality spin bowling, albeit on a difficult track, our batters let down a vociferous 40,000 Kolkata crowd backing them all the way. The MOM was off spinner Harmer who out-thought us with his guile. Yet, it was Bavuma who had earlier steadied the SA ship with his gritty 55 n.o. and shown right application needed. 

At the end of the match, Temba must have been happy yet there was no show of elation only quiet rectitude in true appreciation of his leadership role. Yes, his small stature has been scoffed with pics of him looking ridiculously small against Jansen who’s 6’7” but by the end it’s clear who the real leader of SA is. Pacer Bumrah created controversy with remarks on Temba in the middle & later showed sportsmanship by applauding Temba !

Apart from his on-field heroics, Temba’s quiet disposition and complete commitment should inspire our young star cricketers, for Test Cricket is all about grit & patience and different from the fast-lane of shorter formats. Old timers like me (who’ve been always taunted for being shorties !) but could wield a bat in our days are reminded of our idol, the classy Vishy of the 70s, who despite his short height made batting look a fine art ! Temba proved he’s a worthy adversary. We can’t take him or SA lightly in the 2^nd Test !         

My Review of Web Series on Zee 5

“What an Idea, Sirji!” is a famous ad line for the former ‘Idea’ Cellular but ironically, that is the reaction you have for the Director after watching delightful 5 part Web Series. It has the shades of Frank Capra’s 1946 classic Hollywood movie ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ starring James Stewart, with the underlying message that one must make life simple and uncomplicated for it to be beautiful & serene. Today’s families are overrun by quick fix gadgets & machines & are stressed, technology driven prisoners to the digital world !

The story revolves around a typical urban middle class ‘parivaar’ – an aspiring mid-aged couple, a flamboyant unmarried brother and two tech-savvy teenaged kids into which returns somewhat unexpectedly, the patriarch Dad, a well off, retired Naval Officer. He finds his return isn’t taken warmly by the residents, all so riveted to mobiles, laptops & apps, they’re virtually incommunicado to each other despite living under the same roof. His attempts to make conversation falls on deaf ears with zombie like looks from them.

So ‘Old Man’ throws a lucrative offer they find difficult to let go. The challenge – Rs.1 Cr to each member on one condition- six months they’d have to undergo ‘digital fasting’.  They all fall for it, not realizing what it’d do to their lives revolving around digital world.

To delve more on how each one copes with existence sans mobiles, laptops & apps could be spoilers but this a thought-provoking film that’s futuristic in reverse. After all in the 70 & 80s, when we were young, life went on with it’s simple joys & pleasures, struggles and successes, without the versatile gadgets & devices that we have today but what we remember are family ties & friendships and the prized possessions like letters & cards ! Slowly technology made redundant our gramophones, records, discs, cameras & VCRs. Through the eyes of the ‘Oldest member’ the series explores the family journey as they navigate a tech-free life, rediscover real connections and confront long buried emotions.   

‘Thode Door Thode Pass’ belongs entirely to that brilliant actor, Pankaj Kapur who gave us masterly roles as in “Ek Doctor Ki Maut’ (1990) and ‘Ek Ruka Hua Faisla’ (1986) & many others. He plays Ashwin Mehta, the retired Navy-man with such sublime grace, dignity and humour, that we wonder why aren’t there more roles for him on OTT. Mona Singh as his good natured ‘Bahu’, Ayesha Kaduskar & Sartaj Singh as grand-kids are real slice of life & lovely portrayals ! To me, portly Kunaal Roy Kapur looked a bit of a mis-match opposite Mona, but tries his best as does, Gurpreet Saini as the younger son. 

The series has just five episodes & I binge watched it all in one sitting for 2 hours plus !  It surely lifted my spirits and made me resolve to spend less time on W’App than I do !