Author: Somnath Sinha

Professional banker, sports enthusiast. music lover, singer, writer and amateur film critic

Fine Art of Receiving Praise

It’s always said that we must be open to feedback, analysis and criticism in a positive way for they help us introspect, improve and grow.  What about having the right attitude and grace while receiving praise – assuming that it’s genuine even if it’s in the form of grudging admiration, back handed compliments and from the least expected quarters ! Strangely, a large number of people do not know how to handle praise (not taking celebrities, the very rich and famous into account who are generally subjected to much adulation and get trolled too).

Expectedly, different people react differently – the gentle ones get overwhelmed, for their humility doesn’t allow them to have claim to high acclaim. The suspicious types have mind-set that says we cannot possibly deserve such feedback – anyone who pays us a compliment must be either lying, misguided, or feeling sorry for us and is suspect ! Others acknowledge with a cryptic ‘thank you’ not knowing who to react possibly because they are not used to paying compliments either. But the ‘unkindest cut’ comes when one doesn’t appreciate the complimentary gesture, if one considers others being in an lesser position of authority .

A compliment is, after all, a kind of gift, and turning down a gift insults the person giving it, suggesting that you don’t value them as highly as they value you. On the other hand, paying right compliments is an art. My Dad, who would always inspire everyone with encouraging words, had once said to me ‘ If you’ve to say something good to someone don’t hold back – be eloquent, generous and large-hearted. When you’re being critical be direct, honest, don’t overstate the issue and repeat yourself..’

There are also those who know how to share credit when received – I had once written an article for my Boss which appeared in the newspaper under his name and got him high praise. He directed these to me captioning ‘ You deserve’ ! One need not be arrogant to take a compliment well, just a reasonably well-balanced, self-assured person.

Unless one’s a professional critic or book-reviewer by choice ( or the favourite of the Boss in the office !) , why should one praise others ? Many people, with a high opinion of themselves, find nothing praiseworthy. When and if they do, vanity prevents them to indulge in what they consider flattery or patronage ! An old colloquial proverb simply puts it ‘Only a true goldsmith recognizes the really precious metal !’ My favourite quote remains –  ‘To dance in the rain, you must first learn to praise HIM in the storm’

Receiving Praise

( picture source : soulopeners.org )

City of Champions

The beautiful city of Hyderabad with its regal history and legacy is also a one-stop haven for young techies and whiz-kids with its forward looking window open to innovative ventures and technological marvels. But remarkably, it could well be reckoned as our country’s reservoir of internationally acclaimed sportsman in the past from the legendary cricketers CK Nayadu and elegant ML Jaisimha and class batsman like Azharuddin and VVS Laxman to the incomparable badminton coach, P Gopichand and his protégé Kidambi Srikanth, just to name a few.

In the last decade, it has been giving to India world-beaters in different sporting disciplines, producing champion super-women of the likes of Sania Mirza (tennis) , Saina Nehwal and PV Sindhu (badminton-singles) and Jwala Gutta and Ashwini Ponappa (badminton-doubles), with the first three becoming household names because of the on-court exploits.

Add now to this list of extraordinary women, the name of the soft-spoken but feisty captain of the Indian Cricket team, Mithali Raj, who became the first Indian cricketer to amass 2000 runs in T-20 format as she edged past the King Kohli. She is also the highest run-getter in Women’s ODI cricket with an amazing average of over 51 ( more than even the God of Cricket, and leading scorer in men’s ODI cricket, Sachin Tendulkar ! ). Generally, there is no huge display of emotions from Raj on reaching any landmark but like all greats, she has acknowledged on different platforms  the stellar role of her father in shaping her illustrious career in cricket which started from the age of 16 as she made her ODI debut !

With such an inspiration of girls and many promising youngsters like Smriti Mandhana, Poonam Raut , Harmeet Kaur and others and the veteran bowler, Jhoolan Goswami ( the highest wicket-taker in women’s ODI cricket) in the team, women’s cricket is improving by leaps and bounds but needs great support and nurturing from the authorities to get the same aggression and confidence of the present Indian men’s team ! For starters, while we all know the saga of the coach selection for our team lead by Virat Kohli, most of us would’nt know the name of the coach for the women’s team !

But Hyderabad can boast of a super coach from its ranks, the legendary P Gopichand  – albeit in another wonderful sport, badminton and is doing yeomen service to discover and create champions and to popularise the sport and physical fitness among the young boys and girls of today. People like him and other legends like Prakash Padukone and Rahul Dravid must be given all the administrative support by the Govt.authorities for they are the ones who can ‘lift’ all the talk of our country’s sporting culture to great heights. They can show the way to other big states what excellence in sports is all about.

Mithali Cricketer

The World of Chase

Belonging to much-before era from the ‘Harry Potter’ series and the Sci-fi movies and the advent of Net and ‘Net-flix’, many of us during the 60-70s were hooked onto one of the most prolific British writers of racy thrillers, called ‘James Hadley Chase’ ! I for one, can hardly remember having missed any of his ‘un-putdownable’ pieces of fiction which portrayed the underbelly of an amoral society driven by avarice and carnal lust to become rich and violence and crime that invariably surfaces there-from.

Born as René Lodge Brabazon Raymond, he was well known by his various pseudonyms, but by far the most popular one was ‘James Hadley Chase’. With pulsating titles like ‘Strictly for Cash’, ‘Tiger by the Tail’, ‘Safer Dead’. ‘You’ve Got it Coming’. ‘The Whiff of Money’ and many others, the Chase novels could grip from the first page. No literary genius, he was a superb spinner of spell-binding yarns set in Europe and US, which would occupy most of my waking hours in long train travels ! The climax would generally be explosive as the title of one of his famous novels ‘The Sucker Punch’ !

My favourite was ‘Hippie on the Highway’ which provided the inspiration for the amazing Hindi comic-thriller ‘Victoria 203’ ! It is said that one of his novels ‘ The Wary Transgressor’  was lifted by Hans Hellmut Kirst in perhaps his most famous novel ‘ The Night of the Generals’, which later became a popular film starring the incredible actor, Peter O’Toole in the title role.

Another facet was the wry humour and sardonic feel of his protagonists. Some interesting characters of the police force also recurred in his novels – Sergeant Lepski, the brilliant but violent cop, his superior Lt.Beigler and sensible Chief of Police, Terrell – all working to control crime in the city and nail the killers ! There was also ace Investigator, Maddox, who could smell a false insurance claim, miles away.

All his plots, however, reveal that many with dysfunctional backgrounds have a grouse against socially successful and immoral greed and lust brings out their sordid side to commit heinous crimes for which there is no redemption eventually. It’s really doesn’t pay in the end.

Why revel in the Chase novels after all these years when the present generation wouldn’t know them. It’s uncanny that his depiction of seamy side of civilised society with all its scars and blemishes surfaces with more frequency in today’s world specially the West.

Despite being a major superpower, with all its research, technology, innovations and Nobel prize winners, America’s recurring incidences of mass shootings and it’s violent gun-culture, show ugly manifestations of extreme materialism and break-down of core human values from time to time in certain sections of its society.

James Hadley Chase

 

Shock Treatment

There are two ways of looking at an avante-garde film like ‘Veere Di Wedding’ that’s making waves today. The first could be, as a frothy breezer in the genre of a bawdy adult comedy where the comic parts lie not in the situations but the stream of expletives used with gay abandon in the ‘bindaas’ attitudes of four educated young women, bonding towards shrugging of repressive social norms, including male-bashing if necessary !

The protagonists, appear to represent certain class of society which is well-to-do with affluence but has messed-up private lives with the usual ills – broken homes, bad marriages and failing relationships. They are made to come across as bold and brassy in their approach to life ( and most of all to the institution of marriage and ‘ostentatious’ symbols like elaborate ‘wedding ceremonies’ ) and defying all norms, smoke, drink, swear at will, as if there is no tomorrow !

The other approach of trying to analyze the film for its cinematic contents, is fraught with pitfalls. Obviously, inspired by the “Sex and the City’ series which were hugely popular abroad for their depiction of liberated women at their ribald best and out discover all that life has to offer, ‘Veere’ to an average Indian audience would probably ‘outrage’ the modesty of the genteel class with its profanity that comes hard and fast like never before. However, if the intention is to shock people out of their senses or convey that using colorful language is the norm with young women of today, then it seems to be working, looking to reactions and applause from some of them.

Leaving aside, the shock value of outrageous one-liners and crass jokes, the story-line is weak and only one of the characters seems to have some teeth. The two big stars (Kareena and Sonam) don’t really produce any histrionics  while Swara Bhaskar (and Talsania ) try to come up to their ‘bohemian’ best, un-dress the part and raise a few bawdy laughs too ! In fact a great one-liner comes from one of the fathers in the film – ‘All marriages will have fights, in fact marriage is the foundation of fights !’ A new vision for newly-weds ?!

At the end of two hours, one feels ‘Veere’ seems to have been stitched up for some bold messages from a woman’s perspective and strong bonds that women share that outlasts all else. Somehow, among all the noise, hype and drama, the soul of this film on deep friendship and relationships is quite missing. Farhan Akhtar made ‘Dil Chahta Hai’ on male –bonding a few years back that moved us – revisiting that beautiful picture is a much better option.

Veere Di Wedding

The Silent Treatment

An interesting incident I clearly recall from my working days is that of a distinguished but very elderly gentleman who’d come with his son for some loan documentation – as I tried to explain the banking implications, his eyes conveyed understanding but his lips hardly moved. It felt as if it was his way of communicating ‘Son, say your stuff but I’ll not waste my breath’. This, however, was in contrast to what most of us do – talk ten to the dozen and try to out-talk others to the extent that the point is missed.

Age and wisdom must have something to do with the amount we talk and appreciating that, sometimes, silence can do that better than any words. As the great Socrates had said ‘The more I learn, the less I realize I know !’ It is now well-known that the fine art of listening can be developed more through silence and observing the verbal and non-verbal communication cues.

Having said this, over a period of time one finds that silence has adopted a sort of protesting posture to express anger and become uncommunicative. Other than in fractured professional relationships and ego clashes that take place in the work-place on account of  various  factors, the more disturbing trend is that of people increasingly maintaining stony silence and becoming unresponsive even in their own homes to defy elders trying to assert themselves, hurt own ‘rival’ siblings or punish their partners for pain they may have caused.

Giving the ‘silent treatment’ and not taking calls or replying to messages is the new tool in the modern couple’s warfare and in the family disputes. When people stop talking to each other, the scope for resolving the conflict gets stalled but the best way of solving problems and misunderstandings has to be through dialogues. This silence which conveys anger also, aims to make the others feel guilty and puts more strain on the relationship and leads to emotional deadlock. Hence the communications channels must reopen and talking and taking it off the chest is still one of the best ways to mend fences.

However, let’s look at the lighter and brighter side of ‘silence’ – a smart subordinate is better off silent, than argue with an irate, unrelenting Boss ! Also, as one smart alec said ‘LISTEN’ and ‘SILENT’, both have the same alphabets and amazingly, both are meant for HUSBANDS !’ What say ?!

silent partner

The Unbeatable Soumitra Chatterjee

For Indian cricket, the name Sachin is revered God-like (and yes, of a billion dreams !) and in the same vein, for the Bengali films, Uttam Kumar was ‘Mahanayak’ the ultimate legend whom Kolkata swears by ! But as die-hard fans ( of cricket and Bengali films ) would acknowledge, for sheer consistency, conscientiously cultivated talent and class over several decades, cricket has ‘the wall’ in Rahul Dravid and Bengali films, perhaps with the longest innings ever played, the amazingly gifted and ageless star actor and theatre personality, Soumitra Chatterjee !

Soumitra Chatterjee is one of the most prolific actors of the Bengali film industry and has worked with legendary director Satyajit Ray on numerous films. His body of work has been widely regarded as a milestone in Bengali cinema. He made his silver screen with the film Apur Sangsar (1959), which was directed by Satyajit Ray. He then went on to act in some of the biggest hits by Ray, including Devi (1960), Teen Kanya (1961), Abhijan (1962), Charulata (1964) and Kapurush (1965).

One of his  memorable  and which I still enjoy with childlike mirth, were performances as the super sleuth ‘Feluda’, a Sherlock Holmes like character created by Satyajit Ray in his wonderful detective series of ‘Sonar Kella’ and ‘Joy Baba Felunath’ ( there are several other films of  Feluda with other actors but none with Soumitra’s suavity !)

After establishing himself as a talented actor, Chatterjee starred in a wide genre of Bengali films like Baghini (1968), Parineeta (1969) and Jiban Saikate (1972). However, his real breakthrough came in the film Devdas (1979), which cemented his reputation as a maverick actor. Thereafter there was never any looking back for the man who worked with great film-makers like Mrinal Sen, Tapan Sinha, Asit Sen and Ajoy Kar but is still best-known for his incomparable work with the master craftsman and tallest cult figure, Satyajit Ray.

In a sort of second innings, Chatterjee collaborated with Satyajit Ray again, this time for classics like Aranyer Din Ratri (1970), Asani Sanket( 1973), ‘Feluda’ series in the 70s, Hirak Rajar Deshe (1980) and Ghare Baire (1984). Following this, Chatterjee also starred in some of last of Ray’s celebrated films, Ganashatru (1989) and Shakha Proshakha (1990) and also few lesser known ones. In one of his interviews Soumitra himself has said of Ray  “..Maybe there was some convergence in our thoughts too. He was a rare genius, I am not close to him by any standards yet I guess there was some parity of thought – the legacy of the Bengali educated middle class, the legacy of Tagore…”

Now, at the age of 83 years, Soumitra is still going strong with his innumerable portrayals of a senior citizen and family patriarch facing the dilemma that today’s elders face with the liberalized modern generation and their changing value-systems and nuclear families. One of his recent Bengali drama films ‘Posto’ is one such poignant story of the undying love and bonding of grandparents with the grandchildren with heart-wrenching consequences.

What can be said about Soumitra Chatterjee’s contribution to Bengali cinema. Most deservedly he has been the winner of the prestigious ‘Dada Saheb Phalke Award’ and many national awards in recognition of his huge body of work. The question one may ask (without sounding blasphemous !), would Ray’s films be the same without Soumitra?

Soumitra and Ray

 

 

 

 

Repairs and Maintenance

In school, such stirring lines as in poet Henry Longfellow’s “A Song of Life ” ‘…Life is real ! Life is earnest !…’ exhorted us that you have only one life in the here and now, so make the most of it. But modern day lifestyles extol more on the lines of – life is mending, life is repairing, life is upgrading ! It’s not just about fixing impaired alliances, broken hearts, college admissions, new tax laws and dwindling investment returns or avoiding the unending potholes but maintaining what you still have !

To come straight to the matter’s crux, during the last few months, three fourths of our family time has been invested in hardware repairs and maintenance with the assistance of a variety of specialists –setting right the problems ailing the almirah locks and knobs, falling clothes line, bulbs, geezers and ACs to debugging the laptop, replacing the desktop monitor and getting rid of archaic cable-wala in favour of a new Tata Sky connection were the high-points. However, a formidable list remains to be attended – the leaking roof and the broken tiles in the sitting room ! This is not to underestimate the power of Mumbai traffic snarls and the  intrepid mobikes/autos to dent the car at least on weekly basis and regular repair visits to neighbor-hood mechanic who smiles ironically at the poor vehicle !

Coming to other issues of mundane nature but vital in importance, the usual monthly house maintenance, electricity, gas, mobile bills and Home Loan EMIs which all civilized people meet through ECS or on-line but aren’t there also dozens hounding you for new credit cards, travel schemes, home/car loans and club memberships while retired folks ( like me) receive offers on phones to earn by becoming insurance salesman . Skillfully yet patiently avoiding these traps is needed to maintain sanity !

With fixed deposit rates now plummeting to unprecedented depths, the average house-man (or lady) has to relook his portfolios and seek market advice on how to frugally maintain the depressed looking incomes.

In meeting all these challenges, what remains overlooked is maintaining  the physical self – what then of the morning walks, visits to the gym, low calorie diets and no fried stuff and eateries ? With such pressures and demands on your time, it’s likely that you’d rewrite the famous lines – ‘What is this life, if full of care – we fill our hours to mend and repair !’

Road Repairs

 

 

Making Choices and the ‘Toss’ of Life

Sports like everything else in life faces the challenging dynamics of change . Take the recent proposals in the cricketing world for doing away with the most important first reel of a cricket match ‘the toss’ or the flick of the coin to determine which team has the right to choose to bat or field first.Since there is another version of the ‘toss’ in other sports like tennis and badminton which is not facing any removal, why is toss so vital in the game of cricket ?

As the buffs will understand, in cricket the pitch conditions have a bearing on how the ball will swing/move/bounce and turn to the detriment or benefit of the team batting first. The home-team always has the distinct advantage of preparing the pitch to suit its players and to negate this, it was proposed by ICC officials, that the visiting team would have the choice ( to bat or field first) and the toss became redundant in that case. Deliberations by the Committee appointed by ICC has opined that the ‘toss’ remains an integral part of cricket’s game of ‘glorious uncertainties’ and adds that bit of suspense and agility of the teams and its players to adjust to conditions, often to expect the unexpected and learn to cope with it.

Extending this to the broader canvas of life, management gurus have conceptualized it into the ‘choices’ that one must take (right from Lord Krishna’s epic exhortation to Arjun on the battlefield !). As all of us have experienced, to make the right choice is uncertain but not making a choice is risky, for chances and opportunities lost may not fall our way again. The elements of risk-taking abilities start playing a role but as fund-managers of mutual funds always advise – study, spread and balance your risks. They add, however, that more risk will also fetch more returns !

Some whom we may call adventurers (and reckless ?) are the ones who love quick bucks, job changes, flashy cars, stock market booms, adventure sports and risks of a life in fast lane ! There are others fearful of making changes or committing mistakes, preferring to stay close to what is familiar and not wandering too far and that includes their choices and decisions.

Today, one would have imagined that the progeny of the average, middle-class parents would grow up to be conservative, austere and reticent in their attitudes. However, modern living brewing in a multi-cultural ethos of big cities is throwing up huge surprises catching old traditions and elders off guard. The liberal socio-economic environment and sense of freedom is making our youth just dive into life and do what they feel is right with enthusiasm and excitement, while two decades ago they would have many reservations at the thought of having to step up to anything that might require taking bold action.

At times, the fault lies with parents who try to control too much of their children’s early lives and actions fearing that they will miss out on what the parents, deem to be important unless they chart the proper course for them. Often this later takes the form of rebellion and expression of new found freedom – doing the exact opposite of what the parents wanted.Despite their well–meaning moves, parents have to retract at some stage.

At the end of the day, decision-making is something we all need to learn how to do. More importantly, it has to be taught from very early on since decision-making takes years of practice and the developing right attitudes towards taking responsibilities for one own actions. Learning how to make good choices and wise decisions is not included in school curriculum –they form part of life’s experiences and in owning up to the mistakes made !

Courage

What a Superb 102 Not Out !

Sometimes it just needs two players in a great partnership to string a memorable match-winning innings together – that’s exactly what the film ‘102 Not Out’ does, sans big sets, histrionics, fights, romance and the biggest surprise – no leading lady ( not even in the flashbacks ) !

What makes it work hugely is the sparkling screenplay ( somewhat in the nature of a two-act play),witty dialogues, hilarious situational comic scenes, a fresh musical score but above all, the  incredibly stunning performances by two versatile, veteran actors like Amitabh Bachchan and Rishi Kapoor (not to forget the lovely cameo of a third character, played by a young Jimit Trivedi with the right amount of awe and innocence ! ) .

Big B is absolutely marvelous as he revels in another remarkable role ( after ‘Piku’ and ‘Pink’ ) this time of a 100+ quintessential character, a happy prankster,  who’s perennially young-hearted and loves to spread good cheer all around but more specially to rejuvenate the life of his 75 year old, irascible son. In fact, Bachchan Sir does an ‘Anand’ (Hrishikesh Mukherji’s old classic of the 70s) here as he breathes life and joy and lights up the screen as he enters, countering all the despondency that comes with old age, sickness and inevitable loneliness that surrounds it.

Rishi Kapoor, as the disgruntled son who has accepted the futility of an old man’s existence, proves to be the perfect foil to his boisterous and chirpy Dad who’s always out to test his patience. In a heart-rending turn of events his character resurrects itself again and this Rishi does so effortlessly with all its nuances and poignancy of coming to terms with harsh realities of life.

It would be difficult to conceive of an appropriate end to such a fine inspirational father-son tale – yet what pleased many like me, was how the film leaves you with feel-good thoughts laced with a bit of poetic justice ! But to reveal that, would be depriving others of 100 minutes of happiness !

102 Not Out

The Morning Walk, Eat and Talk

One of my favourite lines (specially for those in positions of authority and power ) is to ‘Walk the Talk’ which is newer way to extol ‘Practice what you Preach’. Apart from many issues that are moral, spiritual and philosophical, this applies as much to physical exercise and the virtues of early ‘morning walk’ which are widely accepted but not followed in true letter and spirit !

While for the happening younger set it‘s the in-thing to sweat and work-out (or pump iron for the seriously physique-conscious !) in a gym that has cool ambience and modern equipments, health-conscious ‘aam-aadmi/aurat’ in almost all our cities are seen thronging the streets and parks for an early morning jog and then switching over to office-gear to catch 8 am bus/train !

Why is the ‘morning walk’ so highly rated as the best ( and the cheapest ?) form of physical exercise apart from the wonders it’s supposed to do to our hearts ? Research proves that numerous benefits accrue – Walking gives you energy for the rest of the day, it’s motivating and removes the “I’ll do it later” excuse, creates a positive mindset for other important activities, gives you time to plan out the day and yes, it ‘magically’ promotes weight loss !

Very importantly, as I’ve discovered during my daily outings, walking in the morning has many social benefits too. Several groups of like-minded people of different age-groups converge at a common dhaba/tea stall and talk animatedly on all subjects under the soft morning sun, over tea and ‘snacks/phafda/phuckas..’. The biggest beneficiaries of morning sojourns appear to be the happy looking, grey haired men’s group (read retired !) who seem to having the time of their lives. They may or may not be part of a ‘Laughter Club’ but have their own stock of morning jokes to relate !

In fact, one of my friends (from senior citizen’s category) is part of a group which meets every Sunday morning in a well-known park to enjoy breakfast goodies pooled in by the members. It’s lot of fun and talk and a little walk !

Morning Walk