To be spontaneous, infinitely flexible, and adventurous like impetuous youth is what we  (specially us retired folks) secretly aspire for but our physique, respectability, maturity in terms of advanced age deters us from bringing out the inner child – till one leaves the known territory  and dashes off to unfamiliar idyllic surroundings escaping the  prying eyes of neighbors ! A drastic transformation in attire, looks, hairstyles … then happens !

Amusing incidents, faux pas and goof-ups are the essential masala to happy trips. As we landed in Srinagar (for the first time in our lives), our designated Driver-guide was not to be found despite our instructions to display a name-sign for us. However, there was a tall, fair man in a cap curiously looking at us till we actually approached him – ‘Yes, I’m Rashid and looking for a family of four senior citizens, but you four don’t fit the bill’ ! Moral of the story – look reasonably old and weather-beaten if you’re a senior citizen !!

Moving on, our image of Kashmir was about snow, chill and icy winds ( at least very cool climes) but here we were sweating at 30 degrees day temps. Ironically, we had packed lots of woolens and too few tees and light wear, it was as if climate was globally mocking,  guys mess with us, we’ll make it hotter ! No parkas, jackets, shawls & scarves then on !     

Our abiding image of ‘paradise on earth’ was of the Bollywood stars and their interludes in various picturesque locales back in the 70s-80s.Our first tourist spot in Pahalgam was famously known as “Betaab Valley’ after Sunny Deol’s debut film, shot there. When we reached (it was a Sunday) an avalanche of tourists were jostling to enter an incredibly stunning bowl surrounded by high mountains, an amazing fun-land with horse-rides.

Though no shooting was in progress, people we doing their own stuff and we joined the ‘bonne soiree’, leaving aside our seniority-induced inhibitions, posing for various pics with mountain goats, using a bird as head-gear and trying out the traditional Kashmiri finery against backdrop of mountains, frolicking in the pretty little streams and clicking a thousand memories for posterity, pretty juvenile but in true-blue Bollywood tradition !  Thereafter every trip and ride in the mountains and valleys was a story of pure romance.

Coming to our hotel stays, not every experience was great though staff were hospitable and courteous but happier when tipped nicely. Eat here as ‘kashmiris’ do but we found the exotic cuisine generally spicy and high on salt. On our request it was toned down by Chefs and the dishes turned salt-less! But, piece-de-resistance was Kashmiri ‘Wazwan’ !

Finally it was time to catch the flight back to Mumbai after a whirlwind trip across the state, but we were in for a shock. The pilot welcomed us aboard the flight to Colombo !! Just as fliers started protesting , the pilot guffawed “Aw, just kidding, we’re to Mumbai’. Not so funny if  your’re a Senior Citizen with creaking joints after a long & ardous trip !

All good things come to an end. The Spice Jet flight was ready to take us homewards to Mumbai after an incredibly memorable trip covering across several favorite destinations (including Pahalgam, Gulmarg, Sonamarg) over ten days ending with capital Srinagar. As we ascended to the blue skies, like a kaleidoscope images flashed across of majestic, magnificent mountains and the rivers gushing, the lush meadows, gurgling streams and gorges, the grazing animals to the breathtaking flora that assume amazing hues as if nature was at its best form ! Cliched it may sound we’re as near ‘Jannat’ as never before.

Yet, images also lingered that with this beautiful backdrop of natural grandeur has been a long story of political turmoil and upheaval and scenes of valour and sacrifice in fierce battles fought on most difficult terrains & of the vigilant soldiers deployed everywhere. There are many perspectives apart from a tourist’s view, so here’s a ‘ground one’ I got ! The insight came from a inscrutable young man curled up in window seat next to me.

I really didn’t notice him but he had measured us up as archetypal tourists. ‘Did you visit North Kashmir, it has less discovered sights that’re amazing’. I guessed that he was 22 years old so I asked him what he did. I bolted upright as he calmly said ‘I’m an Army Officer (Artillery) posted near Kupwara since the last ten months, am going on a 20 day holiday to my home in Nasik’. He was an NDA product and looked boyish. He confessed that being from such a place initially, when he was first posted to a base at 12000 feet & where temps went down to – 23 degrees and snow all around, he struggled to survive.

To show my patriotic fervor I told him we had gone way up to Leh to see the Memorial for the ‘Kargil Heroes’. The said that his Unit had also fought in that War and they had many untold true stories. About his job, what he explained was unbelievable. The ‘Big Guns’ weigh as much as 17000 kgs when put together and so when the war is on the high terrain and steep mountains, the Guns are dismantled and the entire unit (with the help of loaders) physically carry the parts up the mountains, (which one would never dream of even attempting to climb) and then again reassemble it, ready for firing . I was looking at this young man with sheer amazement, imagining sheer physical endurance.

‘How long will you be here in Kashmir, I queried’ ? He said that by next April, he would be promoted as Captain and get another posting. He explained that Army really needed its Officers to command the troops and it couldn’t afford to waste them. On our asking, what the Jawans did the whole day just standing, he said he would get up at 4 am when he commanded a surveillance troop across the city watching the entry of every vehicle. We told him that  Army was doing a great job but for long ? He said that the Army had by now employed almost 50% of the labour in its various activities specially as loaders. The flight was about to land. He had moved on with a languid pace. I had not asked his name.. but it doesn’t matter. These are the nameless and faceless men in uniform who are on their feet day and night, ready to protect their people and defend their country !        

We all agree that politics has no place in our sports but maybe that’s just a truism. Interestingly, cricket isn’t only the most revered and played sport in our country, use of it’s terminology is pretty widespread and of late, figures in most discussions e.g. ‘veteran leader’s ‘googly’ outwitted his opponents’ !

After the hugely significant meeting of the alliance of Opposition Parties that took place and was widely covered by the media, one anchor described the event somewhat like this ‘The team is formed but the captain is yet to be announced. Batting order isn’t yet finalized, though many of the superstars (batters) would like play up the order, it mayn’t be easy to work out. What’s certain is that this team looks quite charged up and ready for the contest. Setting a game-plan to fight present Cup-holders will be a real challenge’ ! 

As sports-lovers we find all this talk exciting but surfeit of cricket of late has become a tad boring (despite the ongoing Ashes) and ‘tennis’ is the game in fashion specially after Carlos Alcaraz became the new poster boy, superbly trouncing the reigning Wimbledon champion & legend, Novak Djokovic ! The young Spaniard’s dazzling display showed that upsets can be caused by new entrants to bring down those considered invincible, sure-shot winners.  

Taking the tennis analogy further and just to illustrate, Alcaraz was down first set (akin to setback in Maharastra for the MVA) but rallied around to fight back in the sets that followed, showing retrieving power and resilience against a great past master who’d thwarted many such challenges earlier, yet didn’t quite judge the determination of  his young opponent, which grew stronger as the crowd support became louder for the ‘new’ title contender !  

As the media has reported, the alliances on both sides are readying for the huge contest ahead in 2024 but this is no T-20 game or even a 5 day Test, it’s has many grueling sets to be played out. But the contest now appears to have become more exciting !

We associate memorable parts of our childhood as much with the nostalgic smell of  the alma mater and friends as with the black leather shoes we’d get wet & soggy in monsoon months, much to the chagrin of our Mothers. Someone good had playfully said ‘When life gives you a rainy day, play in the puddles !’. In those days of 1960s, it’d be sheer joy when heavy showers would force the school to close unexpectedly and we’d spend the day left to our own resources. With no classes we could return home but it was wasting a chance to play ‘wet’ football with friends and get drenched to the skin !

For the younger kids, it entailed a lot of splashing and jostling in the puddles and they’d end the morning paddling their way back home. Parents in good old times were liberal with the ‘rainy day’ syndrome and couldn’t be much bothered with their boys and girls getting wet and soggy. It evoked minor admonition and prompt change of dress. Getting wet in the rains was thought to be healthy, good for the skin and a part of growing up !   

Another reflection of school days were English essays to be written on age-old topics like ‘The Village Fair’, ‘Railway Platform Scene’ or ‘A Rainy Day’. We recall that almost everyone had idyllic and romantic visions of the rains. In our themes, the ‘rains were not mainly in the plains’ but the poets in us would conjure misty mountains and picturesque countryside with lush green flora awash with droplets of rain as the cool moist air would be resounding with chirping of birds after a shower. Many of us would turn into versions of Keats and Wordsworth !  For all of us rains were God’s gift for we were taught that much depended every year on good monsoons for crops and livelihood of the farming community as also to usher in cooler climes and major festive seasons.

Much has altered but most of all has been the phenomenal ‘climate change’, not just for different parts of our diverse country but globally across countries. Now we’re beset in a state of emergency vis a vis water management on one side and devastating floods on the other. Global warming has hit Europe and there’s acute shortage of drinking water being felt in many parts. And as it happened in North India this year, when rains come with fury there’s a deluge in major cities with water-logging, flooding and collapsing of dilapidated structures all around. Poor residents are rendered homeless and commuters struggle with pot holes, traffic jams, stalled cars, slow buses and water on rail tracks.

Not aware of modern academic curriculum, we wonder what would be written about ‘A Rainy Day’ today. It’d be more on disaster management than about playing in the rain !        

Beautifully written by the writer/poet MJ Hashmat and poignantly sung by the versatile Kishore Kumar, is the theme song from Rakhee starrer ‘Tapasya’ (1976), ‘Jo Raah Chuni Toone, Usi Raah pe Raahi Chalte Jaana Re…’. It was a hit of those times for it’s depth of emotions, yet not a big blockbuster for the charts. Inevitability and vicissitudes in life form the lyrics of the song that I’ve tried to translate from Hindi and am sharing for friends who enjoy poetic expressions conveying our innermost thoughts :

On the difficult path you’ve chosen, Undeterred you must go on tireless,

However long and tortuous night be, Burn like a bright light, be sleepless,

The cool shade of the mammoth tree, Is no shelter to relieve it of it’s pain,  

Serving others is purpose of it’s life, For them, it blooms again and again,

Your mirror is the wistful reflection, Of those inner thoughts, moist eyes,

Prepare yourself for what’s in store, Travel destiny’s path and don’t sigh,

Life’s a long journey, moments come, Those we love may go, leaving no ties,

Fortitude and endurance will be tested, Be strong and wise and ask no Why’s !

Saeed Mirza’s 1980’s off-beat film with a kind of self-explanatory title ‘Albert Pinto Ko Gussa Kyon Aata Hai’, about an aspiring youth’s coming of age and growth of political consciousness, had doses of comedy mocking incongruities felt in our society. The title became a popular one-liner for those discomfited with the way things were run, full of angst and feeling aggrieved with the system as such! Fifty years later, that’s transformed into overt aggression, often seen in public places, roads, trains and even flights, you name it !

Yet there was a time when ‘patience’ was considered to be a virtue and young parents would scold their hot-headed kid/s and urge him/her to become ‘shanth’ and not pick up fights with everyone. In school we’d be very scared of the ‘slap-happy’ and irritable teachers who exhibited their intolerance (specially to errant students who didn’t do their homework, bunked  or disturbed classes). Corporal punishment was allowed in schools in those days ! And being ‘chota’ we never to messed with irate big ‘Dada’s’ in our class.  That said, life was much simpler then, it  wasn’t a long and arduous ‘rat race’  as it’s become today for our youth !

Now in digital era of ‘work from anywhere’ and moving in the fast lane in all spheres, be it travel, communication, on-line games, social media, dating apps and relationships, all move at break-neck speeds. Wanna-be professionals & achievers need to ‘hit the ground running’ but many find that they ‘have to keep running hard to remain at same place’ ! Patience in such a scenario is not advocated & people turn resentful if asked to wait.  It isn’t staying back with restraint but overtaking others, that’s now ‘right’ way of succeed !

In Mumbai, whenever elders and the elderly start losing their cool on delays taking place  or any other issue they’re generally reassured by the youth around ‘Uncle, tension mat lo!’ meaning ‘Chill karo, no point in getting excited at your age’. However, the millennial too are a stressed out lot, juggling work-life, daily commute, job pressures, lesser income, family demands, inflation, loans, EMIs etc. This infuriates them and makes them edgy !

Today’s real feedback on perspectives, comes from the bawdy jokes that young ‘stand up comics’ produce on their stage-shows. Hilarious yet cynical view of life in entirety – from parents, spouses, marriage, relationships, small town quirks, societal norms, old rituals, jobs, bosses, colleagues & labored pace of life ! More irreverent and outrageous the talk, more are audience sniggers, raucous laughs, all united in a show of rebellion ! Possibly the only time when young folks listen to someone intently, as someone tells their own story.

Generations have moved on far ahead but old proverbs still hold good ‘One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life’ !

Watching the working class on the ground giving their views on Prime Time channels on the problems faced by the ‘mango man’ is way more convincing than the sanitized and expurgated versions continually offered by  the anchors and the party spokespersons in heated TV debates and which garner great TRPs for reasons difficult to comprehend !

However, in Mumbai we have a better way of getting our ground reports on the affairs of home state UP by simply engaging in conversations with taxi drivers, majority of whom belong to districts of Eastern UP and warm up to people from that area. They may have left their homes to ply taxis in Mumbai ‘shahar’ but remain connected to their roots.

Yesterday, I had personal work in the familiar Fort Area in SOBO (‘South Bombay’, for the uninitiated !) and afterwards hopped on to a taxi to return to Churchgate station. In my customary way, I politely asked the taxi-wala ‘Dada, kahan ke hai?’ and the reply expectedly was ‘UP’. I said ‘UP mein kahan ?’ and the answer came with a hint of pride – ‘Ayodha’ ! Soon we were talking of the ‘Bhavya’ and magnificent ‘Ram Mandir’ with it’s construction on in full swing for its grand opening slated in January next for the public ! According to him UP was in great shape, under a strong administrator. But, of course !

Our man was curious as to why I was in Mumbai though I hailed from Lucknow and I gave him brief highlights of my travels and transfers across the country while serving in a PSU Bank. Reacting as if to say ‘Hail Fellow, Well Met’, he informed he worked as a driver in a PSU Bank for 17 years after which he quit, not getting promoted as a clerk. I joked that in my Bank, the GM’s Driver was a powerful person and carried some clout.

His grouse was that the Driver of the Big Boss had perks but the hours were long and erratic, sometimes going into late nights. Branches could close no sooner the Day-end was completed but in Administrative Offices, meetings and discussions went on & on. I protested that I had worked as Branch Head and in the early 2003-4, there was ISBS system which few knew about and I’d once spent a night in the branch doing Day-end ! He knowledgeably agreed that those days of ‘migration’ were really tough for branches.

By the time we reached, we had recognized we were ‘bankers of the same feather’. As a fraternal gesture he gave me a discount of Rs.2 on the fare. A real professional there !

‘Your views, suggestions and ideas are welcome’ (some even add the term ‘valued’) are often appended to articles, reviews and posts basically eliciting laudatory comments but not quite expecting critiques or perspectives that’s contrary to what’s been propagated. Opinions might differ person to person, but these aren’t welcome by those seeking it !

That said, one thing old timers have in common (apart from post retirement blues !) are loads of time, old stories of their life and times and ready offering of sage advice to the gen-next & next-next, depending on who’s available on hand. But who is listening ? Yet a few decades ago, it was given that seniors (read parents and grand-parents in the joint family system) would rightfully ‘lecture’ off-springs including close nephews/nieces on do’s & don’t’s  and on ‘Sanskar’, even after their being married &  with own children.

Thanks to those practices we got more educated, were married off early by elders to the one considered right for us and started families soon in keeping with family traditions. There was pattern in the ‘family way’ ! No one could retort when family elders spoke on decisions to be taken. Those who did were considered badly brought up and rebellious.

I recall my Grand-mom telling my 45 year old Uncle ‘There’s no need to hide and smoke, your Dad knew of it some 20 years back’ ! She was giving permission to him to smoke in public but Uncle wouldn’t. Question of having beer with Dads was generally unheard of, unless father and son were both from the ‘Fauji’ Services. Exceptions proved the rule ! Archaic as it may sound, none of my friends nor I, smoked, drank or used cuss words in presence of our parents (till much later). My Dad smoked and liked to swear at times !     

But all that seems a very long time ago and parents today listen to children more than they do to them, given the pressures of professional life and social media on our kids. Celebrity veteran actor, Anil Kapoor was asked in an interview (in the presence of his young actor son, Harshvardhan) if he gave advice or tips to him, Anil’s response was ‘I prefer giving advice to children other than my own- because they never want to listen to me’. His son laughed it off saying his Dad wasn’t so much at it, as was his Mom, Sunita !  

In the Netflix’s latest hit, four part tele-film called ‘Lust Stories-2’, the first story has an irrepressible Granny (Neena Gupta is superb !) who talks about importance of physical relations in conjugal bliss to her granddaughter who’s just got engaged. Granny candidly enlightens the girl on her own ‘birds and bees’ stories, much to the girl’s amusement and embarrassment of the mid-aged Son & his Wife, since such talk is taboo in the family !   We may ask ‘Will today’s liberated youth ever need this kind of guidance from elders?’      

A Tribute to the Language ‘Gurus’

On ‘Guru Purnima’ its time to respectfully remember those who imparted knowledge and wisdom to us (to whatever extent possible !). The realistic list is quite illustrious – parents, family elders, our school teachers, great seniors in service life and old friends who we grew up with. But, if we were to talk of communication skills, most of us would credit our language teachers of our early school days for grinding in us the fundamentals of good writing and basics of the spoken word. It was due to their mastery over the subject (the language) that we found some of our brighter classmates becoming proficient in both Hindi and English (in hometown Lucknow)

In the English medium schools, imbibing good proficiency in English has always been stressed, which many argue remains a hangover from our colonial past. Due to the fact that quite a few have regional languages as their mother tongue, many of us, could be reasonably comfortable in finding the apt expressions in English but flounder to find the right words in Hindi for, as one of my teachers said ‘You will express yourself best in the language that you think’! I, for one, had a tough time with my Hindi Sir who tried his best to ‘sanitise’ my Bengali laden Hindi for a first few years.His efforts bore fruit and with time my grammar and ‘Bhasha’ improved.

Coming back to English, I recall that teachers in school would invariably choose words which would not only sound alien but wise. The pronunciation, at times was tough to follow if word ‘maximum’ was spelt ‘yum ya yax I yum yu yum’! Yet learning from them was fun, new lexicon, idioms and phrases and their usage were discovered, names of great books exchanged among us friends and consulting the ‘dictionary’ for difficult words was encouraged. I had once used the word ‘ecstasy’ in one of my school essays and our Sir was a bit surprised. He inquired where I had learnt this word from and asked ‘do you know what agony means?’ There was a knowledge sharing but no admonition for trying to explore… and were all on a discovery trail !

In one of our school elocutions, a speaker started his speech with a nursery rhyme and then went on to connect the threads therein. This became such a big hit that even the established speakers emulated him later. In College debates, funny repartees and punch lines were introduced and rebuttals gave birth to great witticisms, some on the lines of Oscar Wilde’s classic quote ‘nothing to declare except my genius’. Certainly those times were very different, quite shorn of state of art technology, Google and apps but what we got in return from our teachers and education was immeasurable. They taught us how to communicate & even add new languages to our armoury !